Cancel Codependency: A Spell for the Depleted

you tell me you are usually okay
you are strong
you do a lot and can usually manage it
but this is different; everything is piling up

the things you need to do
and what he needs to do
that he keeps not doing
what your therapist says to make him do

you tell me it feels overwhelming
you feel paralyzed by the weight
you just want to lie down in the bed and stay
you can’t keep going

this is an emergency
this is not a test
you are depleted
you are in danger

you feel empty
but he keeps taking
you pay with your mind, body, and spirit
bills he runs up trying to outrun himself

you ask why you feel so guilty
one - the fucking patriarchy
two - the family who showed you how to wife
three - the manipulation

you ask how to stop feeling so guilty
one - fuck the patriarchy
two - identify and release what they taught you
three - this one is the hardest

manipulation is broken by distance
learn about codependency and recovery
stop taking his bait, refuse to mother him
day to day, moment to moment, take different action

you tell me how he used to be such a good guy
the truth is: he used to run good game
you are a millionaire in monopoly money
cash out, stand up, he falls
____

I wrote this piece after a session with a woman who is untangling herself from mothering her soon-to-be ex-husband. Even if you want to stay, this spell can help you break toxic patterns of codependency. She gave me permission to share this here for anyone else who needs it. If you need support, I am here.

Image: Benjamin Balázs via Canva

Earlier today, I had this sweet, warm, delicate post written about how I feel my work changing. It was an announcement of sorts, a warning if you will, about the fact that I'm not actually here to help you tidy your houses. My work is about teaching you how to heal yourself so you can stop fucking around and GO BE THE HEALING FORCE FOR GOOD IN THE WORLD THAT YOU CAME HERE TO BE! I was going to tell it softly, as to not alarm. I've always had so much resistance to it looking like I'm using fear to sell.   Anyway, so I had it all typed up and I went to get a haircut and I came back and opened my laptop and saw news that so deeply offends my senses that I deleted my message.   We're past that now. So here we go. Real talk.   We have run out of time. The world is on fire in a thousand different ways. We need all who wish to participate in the loving transformation of the world to tend their bullshittery that consumes their sacred resources (time, energy, passion, money, brain power, creativity, etc.). We have to release our attachments to things and old wounds. We need to finish this work. It's time to move on to what we came to this planet in this lifetime to do.   I'm about to close registration on the workshops that I use to help people free themselves from the bullshittery. I now believe that this is the last time I will offer the Travel Lightly Project. (I have no idea if I'll continue offering space healing workshops or not but at least there's  the book. ) If you need something radical to shake up your life, say yes to this work. Because your life matters now.   Here's my offer:  If you want to join the Travel Lightly Project,  do that here .   If you can't yet commit to the 6-month experience, then consider the  21-Day Space Healing Workshop . I'm offering it at $21, that is literally one dollar a day to help you change your life. Register  here . Note: If we are not already Facebook friends,  send me  a friend request so I can add you to the FB group.   Do this. I'm being strongly called to move forward into deeper work and I want you to come, too. The world is waiting for you. You are worth it. Yes, I'm sure.  Note: Registration for both workshops (TLP includes the 21-Day Space Healing workshop) will close at sunset today, June 19, 2017.